What the heck am I doing and other questions I ask myself

When the angels first nudged me onto my path over a decade ago, I spent more than a year struggling with the idea of even exploring anything outside the boundaries of my religion. But when I finally accepted that I wasn’t hallucinating or going mad, and chose to take my first baby step forward into the Great Big Unknown, the universe brought me the teachers and lessons that I needed (yes, when the student is ready, the teacher really does turn up).

One of my first teachers was the American angel intuitive and channel, Doreen Virtue. I flew to the Sunshine Coast in Australia just to attend a three-day workshop that she was teaching there. It was a monumental step for me.

Because it took me months to even decide whether or not to attend. I first had to acknowledge to myself that there were things I needed to learn, and to want it enough to be willing to invest a chunk of money on workshop fees, flight tickets, hotel bookings, etc — just for what amounted to 4 days of travel and Who Knew What.

I then had to pluck up the courage to go up to my husband and explain where I was going and why.

To add spice to the mix, at that point in time, I happened to have just been transferred from one department to another at work. I was told by the department secretary that all staff leave for the year had already been booked in advance, so I was left with very slim pickings indeed.

Suffice to say that the universe miraculously worked things out so that I could — and did — go in the end. I had so many awesome visions and experiences packed into those three days that it’s a wonder I didn’t run away screaming.

One of the lessons that I took away from that workshop was that we are all here to be of service in some way or other. I remember Doreen urging us to ask, “How may I serve?” whenever something came up. And I remember sniffing at that because at the time, I felt it reflected a servile, so-not-me attitude that I wasn’t ready to adopt.

Of course the universe, in typical haha-you-have-sooo-much-to-learn! fashion, made sure that something happened soon after I returned to work.

I had my first personal encounter with a lost soul that needed help going to the light; and as Archangel Michael held me steady and gave me the courage to face it, Doreen’s voice came ringing in my ears, advocating me to ask “How may I serve?”.

Stubborn to the end, I rephrased the question to “Is there anything I can help you with?”.

It didn’t matter. The results were the same — a life-changing experience that led to greater personal growth and the flowering of gifts that I never knew or believed I had.

Now, years later, I remind my own students that we are all here to anchor and shed God’s light on this earth, from whatever corner of the universe we have chosen to be in. If you acknowledge yourself as a lightworker, then you would already know that you are where you are in service of God and Creation.

But there are a couple of other questions that I regularly ask myself, for I have found them to be essential in helping me to stand in my truth and stay on the path. They are:

Whom do I serve?
Asking myself this question gives me focus, courage, and strength to keep on the path that I have chosen. The book of Matthew in the Bible states that we cannot serve God and mammon; and personally, I have found this to be true regardless of faith and religion. This question also effectively reins me in when I am in danger of being blinded by the glitter of glamour and the illusion of ego.

Why am I doing this?
If my answer is “fear” or “duty”, then I know I need to work out my own issues and, if it is appropriate, to let them go. But if I can truthfully admit that I do what I do out of personal conviction and love, then I know I am on the right path. Better yet, it renews my passion for my work.

And that often brings me back to the first question again … and so my cycle of growth continues.

May you, too, find these questions useful tools in your own cycle of growth. I share them with you in love and in truth.


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